Keeping the conversation going with that new friend you just made can be quite tricky. It is easier to make a new friend than to find something interesting to talk about to make the new experience worth remembering. Sometimes, you find yourself in a corner after running out of ideas of what you can talk about. You wonder what questions to ask a new friend, and if you have no clue, either a long, uncomfortable silence will follow, or you may find yourself becoming irrelevant.
With these simple tips on questions to ask a new friend, you can be sure to make the most out of meeting that somebody new. The best way to know someone better is to be truly interested in them, as opposed to talking too much about you. Getting to know their interests and what they do with their spare time is a good place to start. Let’s look at some of the questions to ask a new friend that will save you from awkward situations and give you a delightful pass-time with your new friend. Key to note is that you do not show up with a paper full of questions in your hand as if you are treating your new friend to an interview. Let the conversation flow. You may even end up discussing deeper and better things than you have envisioned.
Good questions to ask someone new, about their interests
You really love what you do, don’t you? How did you learn?
This is a good conversation starter when you’ve met someone who is in the midst of their game such as an actor, band member, swimmer, or any other talent they may have. There will be such a natural flow of ideas if they are willing to open up to you. Other questions that may follow to be able to dig deeper into your friend’s art are:
Have you always been this good? When did you learn to be this good?
Your friend should basically open up and give you a brief history of themselves, which you should show real interest in.
You are very talented, what else are you this good at?
This is where you get to learn more about your friend’s other talents. You can even compliment them for how multi-talented they are.
Can you teach me how to do this?
You can even heighten up your show of interest by wanting to learn their art too. This will definitely create an avenue and even future avenues that will bring you together, and you’ll be on a journey to strengthening your friendship.
Basic questions to ask someone and know them better
What is your name?
A person’s name is usually the first thing we ask when we meet someone, which unfortunately, we end up forgetting anyway. Sometimes it shouldn’t. Once you’ve already gotten to know someone’s interest, then it will come up naturally, like “I did not get your name…” and trust me, it will be more relevant and so much easier to remember. Most people find it offensive when you don’t remember their names even though they may not show it. Remembering your friend’s name is key starting right. It proves you are truly interested and works wonders in building lasting relationships.
Where do you like to go when you want to pass time?
More often than not, young people have a lot of time on their hands and probably looking for someone to pass time with. If you are in this bracket, you could exchange ideas on fun things to do and where to do this. This will slowly but surely create a bond between the two of you and will also be an avenue to meet other new friends. For friends who love to travel, or dine in restaurants, for example, this can be a good way to get time going with some company.
Questions about family and childhood background
It is at times inevitable to ask about one’s family because sooner or later, you may have to face some of them. These questions can be quite personal, but they tend to bridge the gap between new friends if they are okay with opening up about their lives. Questions can include:
What was your life like growing up?
Positive or sad stories about childhood can come up here, but that is the whole essence of the conversation. You may find something you have in common, and it also brings out certain strengths or vulnerabilities that will help you relate with your friend from a point of knowledge. Topics can include your siblings, education, financial situation, friends and peer pressure, academic excellence, life dreams when you were younger, and so on. Other issues that will come up in this case are how many brothers or sisters they have, the eldest or youngest in their family, whether they are married or not, as well as his or her nephews or nieces.
Tell me about your parents and grandparents
During holidays such as Christmas or other, people like to celebrate with their close family members especially their parents and grandparents. Finding out how his parents are, where they live, how his relationship with them is, is a good thing as your friendship may end up in invitations to their home during some of these events.
Do you love upcountry life?
Some people are nostalgic about upcountry and spending time helping their parents and grand-parents. If this is the case, planned visits there will make your bond grow. There is something about bonding with your friend’s family that has a stamping effect on your relationship.
Questions to ask when meeting someone, about relationship status
Sometimes you feel that you are of age, and happen to meet a friend of the opposite sex whom you really like, and after getting to know other aspects of their lives better, you want to dig deeper to find out about their availability in the relationship department. When you feel the time is right, here are some of the questions you can ask.
Are you married or do you have a boyfriend or girlfriend?
There is no other easier way to ask this. It just has to be as direct because you also need an honest and direct answer.
What do you think of the age difference between people who are dating?
You may ask this if you are concerned about your friend’s thoughts on age difference. The answer will help keep you at ease, and determine if you’d rather forget about the potential romantic relationship.
Do you think it’s good to get married when you are young or is it better to wait a while?
This helps you to know how ready your friend is for a relationship, or what they think of commitment. If your views do not match, maybe you can consider understanding them better or just subtly look the other way.
What about inter-racial or inter-tribe dating?
If you are worried about discrimination and need someone who shares your views, this is a good question to ask. Remember, you cannot walk with someone unless you agree, and this will help you know their values so you can draw the boundaries.
Simple questions to ask that come when complementing a new friend
There are conversations that are so common among a group of ladies or gentlemen that it is almost impossible to have a conversation without them. For example, ladies love to look good, have great hair, and be seen in the latest fashion, while the majority of men love football, gambling, and playing chess. Questions along these general lines of interest can easily get the conversation going. These can begin with a simple complement and include:
Nice hairstyle, where did you get it done?
Where do you do your clothes shopping?
I love your lipstick, where do you usually buy it from?
Did you watch the latest match between Arsenal and Manchester United?
Personal questions to get to know somebody better
For a more personal touch, these personal questions will do. As long as your friend is willing to be a little vulnerable, it will be really nice to get to know them better.
What is the biggest challenge you have ever faced in life?
Life’s challenges can bring out someone’s personality. How they handle these challenges will help you know how they’ve grown as a person in terms of virtues. Being empathetic and very understanding is crucial to building trust.
What do you feel is your purpose in life/what you were called to do?
When someone is aware of their purpose in life, they know where they are at and where they are going. Even if they do not, it is an avenue to support them through it and you never know, you could be the avenue they needed to make their dreams come true and at the same time, also assist you in yours.
What issues do you struggle with that you wish you would change?
Sharing life’s struggles creates trust and allows you to get the help you need. You realize you that others also face similar struggles. It is easy to be tempted to portray a picture of perfection but we all know that we have vulnerabilities, and sometimes we have to take that chance with a new friend. Be sure not sound too desperate though. A touch of positivity will do.
Interview questions to get to know someone career-wise
Almost all people you meet are either pursuing their career or are starting to do that. This is a healthy topic especially in the work sector, for example at the office, or in corporate dinner outings.
How did you choose this career field and how did you get into it?
If you are interested in the career path of a new friend, you may ask how they started out and borrow some tips on how to do it on your own. Maybe they could also be resourceful in linking you to helpful sources or becoming the mentor you need in that industry.
What goals do you have for yourself in the short-term and in the long-term?
Having knowledge of how big (or small) your friend is dreaming will challenge you to dream too. It is good to take advantage of the value that your friend brings to the table and progress from that. Many people rose and became their best in life because of the push of positive influencers such as focused, no-nonsense friends.
What is that one thing in life that you really want to accomplish?
This question also draws you to have your own focus and purpose in life. With the right motivation, you could even discover your purpose and begin to live it or work toward it.
What challenges do you face while pursuing your career?
Almost all people can relate with one challenge or the other in their area of work, and this is a good thing to find out from your new friend. It keeps you armed and ready knowing all will not be smooth. It is usually followed by the question on how those challenges were overcome.
Who is your role model?
If you admire your friend and you want your friend’s friends to also influence your life, it is good to know where they get their inspiration from. Having similar interests will give you a lot to talk about.
Fun questions to ask someone and still know them better
Do you believe in destiny or coincidence?
There are people who believe that everything happens for a reason and is part of destiny, and others who just don’t. This can be a good way to find out what someone makes of the events that happen in their lives, and how seriously they take them.
Which movie would you re-watch over and over without feeling bored?
We all have movies that we can’t get enough of. That’s a good place to start if you want to find something fun to do and you want to find out your new friend’s interests.
What was the best thing you ever did, and what was the worst?
This is a fun question as it will freshen up the memory of your new friend and bring up an interesting conversation about some of their past actions that are laughable, regrettable, or worthy of applause. You will also have the chance to share your own and it will be a delightful experience.
What’s your most embarrassing and most glorious moment?
We all have that moment that we wish never happened or those lovely moments that we would love to replay over and over. Such moments can be nostalgic or reminders of how far we’ve come and the progress we’ve made as individuals. They are motivators.
Religious/spiritual questions to ask a new friend
Sometimes we meet someone in the church setting, which happens to be the most common place these days due to the large number of church-going populations. It is inevitable to ask questions related to church and religion. These questions are, however, not limited to the church setting and can also be asked elsewhere for example someone who is interested in dating a new friend. Here are a few tips:
Are you born again, when did you give your life to Christ?
If you are born again and you would like someone who is likewise so you can build each other spiritually, this is a good place to start. When you talk about issues and link them to scriptures or a higher power, then you will be in agreement. Their journey to salvation can also be an interesting topic of discussion.
In which docket do you serve in your church?
This is to enable you to know their gifting and also what they are likely to do in their free time. If you want to join a certain ministry, it will be easier once you are introduced by a familiar face.
If God were to grant you one wish, what would it be?
If you are interested in knowing that one very important desire that your new friend has, you may ask this. Sharing your own will also help unmask what you long for, and as they say, friends that pray together will stick together.
The list of questions to ask a new friend is endless. It all goes down to what you are interested in finding out. Ensure you are not too pushy or too interrogative. Allow your friend to be free to reveal what they want to or conceal what they are uncomfortable talking about. Be confidential about information entrusted to you where the need arises, to be able to be trustworthy to your new friend.