All relations are ups and downs, they always include moments of happiness and times of despair. But when relationship ruins because of cheating, sometimes it is really hard to collect your broken pieces and keep on living. Of course, time heals any wounds, but we have several faster and more effective ways of surviving the cheating.
1. MUST: Define the "red flags"
Now, when everything is over between you two, you can easily define those alarm signals that were present in the behavior of your ex that took precession of cheating or pointed at it. This could be fierce protective position in answer to the most softball questions or even disappearing for a couple of days. For you, the realization of some details to which you didn't give much importance may become a real sudden clarification, as in reality they all had a hidden meaning. Well, it's time to learn the lesson.
2. PROHIBITED: Pretend that nothing happened
Feelings will not go away in a single night, and you may even try to revive your relations. But you shouldn't close your eyes on what has happened, as there are all changes that the story may repeat.
3. MUST: Find strength in yourself
It doesn't matter whether you were dating for a few months or a few years: cheating hurts, and it hurts really hard. But this is your chance to find your inner pin and start shining like never before. There is nothing more attractive than a woman who knows that she can feel fine even alone.
4. PROHIBITED: Count on your ex
If your ex were reliable for 100%, this situation wouldn't have happened. So, you shouldn't rely on the person who not only lied to you but also neglected your trust. Besides, looking for comfort in someone who caused you pain is a real contradiction, isn't it?
5. MUST: Prioritize time with close people and your own precious self
One of the best ways to distract from negative emotions is to do something pleasant for yourself. Think over what you would like to do right now. You may go shopping, make a party with friends, listen to your favorite band. It is also important to spend time with close friends and relatives. They can help to look at the situation from another angle. Good laughing will also be useful.
6. PROHIBITED: Withdraw into your shell
This means that you should leave all these sad songs about love, heart-rending soap operas, tons of ice-cream and sweets in bed for the more fitting occasion. This will only worsen the situation, and you risk to sink in the pity on yourself.
7. MUST: Understand that you deserve better
Before moving to the new relations, you need to believe that you deserve better. No one deserves cheating and if this happens, this is to the good. So, before loving someone, you need to learn to love yourself.
8. PROHIBITED: Waiting that the ex will come back
If you are still ready to give him a chance, think well if you really trust this person. Otherwise, what's the point of wasting months and even years trying to improve relations with someone who doesn't deserve this. Because in this way you waste your chance on meeting the person who will really appreciate you.
9. MUST: Accept, forget and move forward
Now, when you had some time on self-reflection, the following step will be the acceptance. There is no point in trying to change the person, and no point in carrying the insult in your heart. You need to move forward. One day you will be grateful to your ex for opening your eyes on what you don't deserve, and what you will not let happen in the next relations.
10. PROHIBITED: Get stuck
Replaying the insult again and again, seeing the traitor in any man, working out the revenge plan and reveling in your grief. All this will only spoil your mood. And what's the point of constant reminding yourself of the negative experience? This wasn't your fault, and you need to stop thinking of yourself as of the victim.
11. MUST: Believe in love again
Getting some cynicism after the break is quite normal. But it is important to understand that trust is the base of any relationship. You shouldn't bring the negative experience to the new relations: analyzing too much, always keeping your ears and becoming a secret agent. You may be surprised, but people are not that bad as you think.
12. PROHIBITED: Comparing
When you finally start dating with someone, avoid comparing this man with your ex. And why should you? These are the new relations, new circumstances and, at last, the new person. It will be unfair to punish your new darling for others mistakes.
Be glad for what new relations give you. Who knows, maybe this is your true second half for your whole life. But do not forget the 12 things listed here.