What would you do to save your family when your husband's relatives are harassing you, and you have trouble conceiving? One Nigerian woman posts her inquiry to Nigeria's largest forum, Nairaland, - but she is not looking for advice alone.
The user with the nickname Princess2011 tells her story thus. Five years ago, she married her sweetheart after they’d dated for three years. His side of family, however, were not very enthusiastic about him marrying a lady from a different tribe.
But the real trouble has started when the couple began trying for a baby. The author says she’s had multiple miscarriages, and her husband’s mother and sisters don’t lose an opportunity to insult her or argue with her.
The author specifies in the comments section her husband is against birth via surrogacy, and she has suffered and lost a lot of blood with every miscarriage. This is why eventually, she says, they came to a conclusion to adopt.
After a series of legal procedures, the couple were granted permission to enlist the help from any adoption house of the country.
This is where the forum user Princess2011's story comes to its rather unexpected culmination: the couple don’t want the husband’s family to ever know that the child isn't biologically theirs. Since they were unable to find a newborn baby at the adoption homes they’ve visited (the author even says they were directed to a baby-selling factory!), they are seeking for someone "with an unwanted pregnancy” or who is willing "to give out her baby for adoption".
Princess2011 ends her story asking readers not to send her hate — “Remember, you will get married someday,” she says, and leaves her email address for contact.
In the latest update to the story, she says she contacted someone willing to give their baby up for adoption, but no arrangements have been made so far.
Those moved by the story, both men and women, are kind and understanding in the comment section, and advise her to get a medical check. Some readers, however, express skepticism: what if her husband’s family finds about the adoption, after all? And what happens if she gets pregnant in the future, already having had adopted?
This heart-breaking story, told on a public forum in just a few lines, touches upon so many issues that are too real in our everyday lives. Inter-tribal marriage and family struggles, the stigma of infertility, the opposition of having "own flesh and blood" baby and adopting, baby factories...
What would you advise this lady and her husband?