You have this man with whom you enjoy each others’ company. He is charming, loving and caring. You have good chemistry and are always looking forward to hanging out with him. You have been friends for a long time and even want to be more than friends. The two of you are always together, and some of your friends think that you are a couple. Your relationship is, however, not defined and sometimes, in your own moments, you pause and think, why does he keep me around if he doesn’t want a relationship? Do you want a real relationship yourself, or are you content with the current arrangement?
How do you know if a guy is keeping you as an option? Some men can be sly. He wants you around, but not as a girlfriend. He will not tell you his true feelings about you because that will put you off. You may enjoy your time together, but you are the kind that needs clarity, even in the simplest of relationships.
Why does he keep me around if he doesn’t want a relationship?
Some men do not know how to communicate, and that is why you are in a half-baked relationship. You want everything or nothing, as sketchy situationships do not work for you.
1. He enjoys sleeping with you
This may not come as a surprise, but yes, he only wants to sleep with you, nothing more. You are a good lay. You satisfy him, and he enjoys every inti*mate moment with you.
Sleepovers and the nights you spend with each other are magical. He craves your body, your warmth, and how you make him feel as a man. Unfortunately, that is all there is. He just needs to sleep with you and nothing extra.
2. You are comfortable with the bare minimum
As a woman, you need to know what the man you are with can offer. What does he bring to the table? He should be a high-value man who treats you like a princess.
Do you ask for more, or are you comfortable with the bare minimum? Are you okay with the little he gives? Demand for more and see how he reacts. He probably enjoys keeping you around because you are not as demanding as other girls.
3. He sees other people
How do you know if a guy likes you but doesn’t want a relationship? He has other options. This one could be true, as painful as it sounds. You are not the only person he sees. He has another girl on the side or even multiple women that he juggles.
He does not want a relationship with you because he can’t offer what is needed in a relationship. Having several women around him excites him as he gets specific things from each one of them. He wants you but also needs Jane, Lillian, Michelle, and Clare.
4. He is a confused man
When a guy keeps coming back to you, what does it mean? He appears to be present in your life but is not wholly in it. You will be amazed that a grown man would be confused about something as simple as this. He is not sure that a relationship is good for him. He thinks that he will miss the single life.
The idea of a relationship does not appeal to him because he does not know what he needs. He admires you as a person and loves to entertain you around but does not know for how long.
5. Relationship trauma
Everyone comes with baggage, and his baggage may be a relationship trauma. He was probably a different person before, and a particular relationship messed him up. He is damaged because a former partner was toxic towards him, and there is little he could do.
He does not want to make you his girlfriend because he is yet to heal from the ex who used to cheat on him, humiliate him and despise him even after he gave her all the love and care in the world.
6. He is hurting
You may never fully know what someone is going through until they open up. Is he the kind who can be vulnerable with you, or does he keep things to himself?
He is probably hurting from something and does not need a relationship with you because he feels he will be dragging you in his clutter. He is possibly hurting from family issues, friendship breakups, financial crises, or personal issues.
7. He doesn’t think you are girlfriend material
He loves that you are his booty call but does not think of you as girlfriend material. He will do everything you need; buy you gifts, surprise you at your birthday party, cheer you up when you are feeling low, but draw the line on giving you the girlfriend title.
He likes you as a woman, not just his main woman, and there is nothing you can do to change that. If he says he doesn’t want a relationship, will he change his mind? Chances are he will not.
8. He doesn’t want other people to have you
He takes pleasure in your company, even loves you a bit, but does not want other people to experience you. Are you looking for signs he doesn’t want anyone else to have you? He hates it when you hang out with other men. Might show a little jealousy when you are out with other people and will even come to pick you up so he can be with you.
He loves you, but not enough to make you a girlfriend. He is a weirdo who is also selfish. When he doesn’t want you but doesn’t want anyone else to have you, keep your distance if you can.
9. He does not want to hurt you
He likes seeing you happy and understands that telling you that he does not want a relationship may hurt you. He cares about your little heart and does not want to see it broken.
You may pose the idea of a relationship, but he will not give you a definite answer. He will neither say yes nor no and will swiftly change the subject. It is one of the top signs he doesn’t want anyone else to have you.
10. It is too early for him
He feels like there is still time to enjoy each other’s company without labels. Relationships are serious to him, and making you his girlfriend means that he is certain you are the one.
He is not ready to introduce you to his family or friends as he is unsure where the two of you are going. He also thinks that jumping into a relationship may ruin your good chemistry and even create unnecessary issues.
11. He is hung up on a past relationship
He constantly thinks about his ex, even when he is with you. He wishes e could mend the broken relationship but does not know how to. Being around him makes him feel loved even though he does not love you the way he loved his ex. A man like this should not be entertained because he only sees you as an object of pleasure and not a real person with feelings.
12. He does not know what you want
He has probably thought of the idea of a relationship himself but does not know how to bring it up. He thinks you are cool with the arrangement and does not want to make things awkward by asking you to be his girl. Voicing your thoughts may help as the assumptions the two of you could be an obstacle to a potentially fruitful relationship
13. He is scared of commitments
He hates commitments. He wants to live like a free bird without consequences. You may wonder why he enjoys your company and needs you at his house every other time but does not want to be your boyfriend.
You have your answer; he is scared of commitments. He says he doesn’t want a relationship but still wants to see me. He is commitment-phobic. He feels like a relationship will tie him down and enslave him.
14. He does not want to be lonely
He does not want a girl in his house all the time but also does not want to be lonely. Sounds perplexing, but this is how some men operate. He only needs you over the weekend because his house is too quiet.
He needs someone to chat with, make meals together and have a good time with every once in a while because solitude gets him into depressive episodes. He is using you as a tool to plaster his loneliness.
15. He does not want to be rejected
This may come as a surprise, but yes, men are afraid of rejection too. He enjoys your feminine energy and likes the bonus of inti*mate moments. He may want more but also knows that he may blow things off by asking.
He does not want to be rejected as your time together will be awkward after the rejection. He wants to feel loved and wanted, and by introducing a relationship, he may lose everything.
You could do everything in your power to insinuate that you want a relationship, but your guy may not read the signs. Instead of sitting still and asking yourself, ‘why does he keep me around if he doesn’t want a relationship?’ Why not ask him about it? You will get clear answers, and your heart will be settled. It is better to ask and get an uncomfortable answer instead of wallowing in fantasy that he may change his mind about your arrangement.
Yen.com.gh published an article about real men quotes to inspire you to do your best every time. Real gentlemen are strong and do well in masking their many fears. This is the more reason these people need to inspire themselves with real men's quotes.
Several quotes and sayings inspire the real men in your life. Remember that no matter how strong they appear, they are also human and should be encouraged and appreciated at every given opportunity.