30+ funny Bible verses about laughter and humour that will make you smile
The Bible is a book like no other because it was written many years ago but still remains relevant to this day. The Holy book talks about everything imaginable to man and has been a guide on how Christians should live. Though a Holy book, it is not without its fair share of humorous verses that can make you smile. The funny Bible verses will teach you to let loose at times and enjoy the things that make us happy.
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The entertainment industry has been divided along the lines of secular versus gospel. This makes people wonder whether it is possible to have distinguishable secular and gospel comedy. To answer this question, the Bible is filled with funny Christian quotes.
Funny Bible verses
There is no shortage of funny Bible quotes that are entertaining as they are informative. Such verses will make you burst into laughter. So, what are some crazy things in the Bible?
- Elisha left Jericho and went up to Bethel. As he was walking along the road, a group of boys from the town began mocking and making fun of him. ”Go away, baldy!” they chanted. “Go away, baldy!” Elisha turned around and looked at them, and he cursed them in the name of the Lord. Then two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of them. (2 Kings 2:23-24)
- Worst of all wounds is that of the heart, worst of all evils is that of a woman. (Sirach 25:12)
- Eat the food as you would a loaf of barley bread; bake it in the sight of the people, using human excrement for fuel.” The Lord said, “In this way the people of Israel will eat defiled food among the nations where I will drive them.” Then I said, “Not so, Sovereign Lord! I have never defiled myself. From my youth until now I have never eaten anything found dead or torn by wild animals. No impure meat has ever entered my mouth.” “Very well,” he said, “I will let you bake your bread over cow dung instead of human excrement.” (Ezekiel 4:12-15)
- Happy is the one who seizes your infants and dashes them against the rocks. (Psalms 177:9)
- The lookout reported, “He has reached them, but he isn’t coming back either. The driving is like that of Jehu son of Nimshi – he drives like a maniac. (2 kings 9:20)
- You poured me out like milk. You spun me around and squeezed me like someone making cheese. (Job 10:10)
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- Look, I have two virgin daughters. Let me bring them out to you, and you can do with them as you wish. But please, leave these men alone, for they are my guests and are under my protection. (Genesis 19:8)
- Even dunces who keep quiet are thought to be wise; as long as they keep their mouths shut, they’re smart. (Proverbs 17:28)
- The rich can be sued for everything they have, but the poor are free of such threats. (Proverbs 13:8)
- As a dog returns its vomit, so a fool repeats his folly. (Proverbs 26:11)
- Then Gideon said to God, “Don’t be impatient with me, but let me say one more thing. I want to try another time with the fleece. But this time let the fleece stay dry, while the dew drenches the ground.” (Judges 6: 33-40)
- Better to meet a grizzly robbed of her cubs than a fool hell-bent on folly. (Proverbs 17:12)
Inspirational funny Bible quotes
Christians will rebuke you for funny Bible verses taken out of context but comedy lovers just use them for humor. Some Bible verses may be funny but they are actually meant to inspire you and they include:
- As Paul spoke on and on, a young man named Eutychus, sitting on the windowsill, became very drowsy. Finally, he fell sound asleep and dropped three stories to his death below. Paul went down, bent over him, and took him into his arms. “Don’t worry,” he said, “he’s alive!” (Acts 20:9-10)
- It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman. (Proverbs 21:19)
- Then the Lord commanded the fish, and it vomited Jonah up onto the dry land. (Jonah 2:10)
- Like a gold ring in a pig’s snout, is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion. (Proverbs 11:22)
- A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike. (Proverbs 27:15)
- Then Saul told his officers, ‘find me a woman who can talk to the spirits of the dead. I’ll go to her and find out what’s going to happen.’” (1 Samuel 28:7)
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- Jesus did many other things as well. If every one of them were written down, I suppose that even the whole world would not have room for the books that would be written. (John 21:25)
- These people are not drunk, as you suppose, for it is only nine o’clock in the morning. (Acts 2:15)
- Early in the morning, as Jesus was on his way back to the city, he was hungry. Seeing a fig tree by the road, he went up to it but found nothing on it except leaves. Then he said to it, “May you never bear fruit again!” Immediately the tree withered.
- So Gideon took the men down to the water. There the Lord told him, “Separate those who lap the water with their tongues as a dog laps from those who kneel down to drink.” (Judges 7:5)
- Stupid people say bad things about their neighbours. Wise people know to be quiet. (Proverbs 11:12)
- Jesus refused. “First things first. Your business is life, not death. Follow me, pursue life.” (Matthew 8:22)
Unbelievable Bible jokes
What does the Bible say about laughter? The Bible encourages people to laugh because by smiling life is increased by some seconds. Below are some of the funniest verses in the Bible:
- Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife. (Proverbs 21:9)
- Then Jael, Heber’s wife took a nail of the tent, and took an hammer in her hand, and went softly unto him, and smote the nail into his temples, and fastened it into the ground, for he was fast asleep and weary. So he died. (Judges 4:21)
- “If a man’s testicles are crushed or his penis is cut off, he may not be admitted to the assembly of the Lord. (Deuteronomy 23:1-2)
- For in much wisdom is much grief: and he that increaseth knowledge increaseth sorrow. (Ecclesiastes 1:18)
- A feast is made for laughter, wine makes life merry, and money is the answer for everything. (Ecclesiastes 10:19)
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- Your nose is like the tower of Lebanon looking toward Damascus. (Song of Songs 7:4)
- He fled naked, leaving his garment behind. (Mark 14:52)
- I wish those who are disturbing you might also get themselves castrated. (Galatians 5:12)
- When Joshua was an old man, the Lord said to him, “You are growing old, and much land remains to be conquered.” (Joshua 13:1)
- Then Judah said to Onan, “Go in to your brother’s wife, and perform your duty as a brother-in-law to her, and raise up offspring for your brother.”
- Does not nature itself teach you that if a man wears long hair it is a disgrace for him. (1 Corinthians 11:14)
Worry not when in need of something to cheer you up and the only thing around you is a Bible. If you did not know, there are very many funny Bible verses that can bring laughter and humour into your life. Such verses are good especially for young children because they encourage them to read the Bible more.
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