100+ dark humour pick-up lines that are serious and hilarious to use in 2022

100+ dark humour pick-up lines that are serious and hilarious to use in 2022

Love is a beautiful thing because it involves two people who get attracted to each other but it is often misunderstood. The same love can mysteriously torment even the strongest of men and women when it is not reciprocated. Ideally, it should involve giving and receiving but most people give without receiving. The importance of dark humour pick-up lines is to ensure that the other person falls in love with you from the onset and reciprocates the feelings you have for them.

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You will earn yourself extra points if the first impression you give your crush is of a hilarious and funny person. People tend to go for partners who know how to make them smile even when their world is crumbling down. With successful dark humour pick-up lines, the relationship will start on the right footing and have a better chance of lasting longer. However, some may not take these jokes lightly because they make fun of forbidden topics.

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Dark humour pick-up lines

Sometimes you may hear a pick-up line that leaves you confused, whether it is actually complimenting a person or insulting them. When crafted well, such pick-up lines can impress your crush and make them fall in love with you. Such pick-up lines include:

  • Don’t say you are not a banana because I find you a-peeling.
  • I hope you didn’t choke on a light bulb because your chest is all flashy.
  • I know why you are so tired. It is because you have been running naked all day in my mind.
  • I thought you were catwoman because you just made the Dark Knight to rise.
  • Do you prefer your milk delivery across the front or back? I wouldn’t mind taking it through the back.
  • I have some candy out in the back in my van. Care to join for some fun?
  • Call me baby because all I want is to be inside you forever.
  • Something is definitely wrong with my cellphone because it does not have your number in it.
  • I dream of enjoying you just as I do my coffee. I seal it in an airtight bag and then put it in a freezer for maximum enjoyment.
  • Don’t worry if you are a vir*gin, I am a good teacher for first lessons.
  • I hope you are feeling down because all I want is to feel you up.
  • We all die someday. Let’s just go out before our time elapses.
  • Please lend me your shirt. I want to pay the bartender but I need company.
  • Are you a school playground? Because I would shoot kids in you.
  • If I had to wish for you to be anything it would be a shark because I have some swimmers I’d want you to swallow.
  • Sleeping alone is a waste of my sexual talent.

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dark humour pick up lines
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Source: UGC
  • Are you a bad girl? Because I’d like to take you to my room and teach you a lesson or two.
  • Did you fart, because you just blew me away.
  • You are so hot that my zipper is falling for you.
  • I am usually on top of things and I’d like to be the same way when it comes to you.
  • I have never been a fan of watching sunsets, but I’d surely enjoy watching you go down.
  • You must be in the wrong bar because the wet T-shirt contest is in the next bar. Follow me, I will show you where it is.
  • What time do your legs open? I don’t want to be late.
  • According to the weather report, there’s a 95% chance you will get six inches tonight.
  • I have a huge mirror in my bedroom. Would you like to come with me and watch some adult content?
  • Screw me if I am wrong, have we not met before?

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Funny pick-up lines

Humour is the best way to tackle a very serious subject like love because it makes people understand you quickly. Below are some of the most effective funny pick-up lines to use:

  • I want to throw you a house party. On my bed!
  • Are you a corn field? Because I can’t help but stalk you.
  • Hey beautiful, feel my shirt. Do you know what it is made of? Boyfriend material.
  • Should you get lost in the darkness I’ll be there to help you find the iron rod.
  • Are you made of dark matter? Because you are indescribable.
  • Smell this rag! I know you have no problem with inhaling the chloroform.
  • I think I am about to die because your looks are killing me.
  • It is a shame that I live with my parents, would you mind if I moved in with you?
  • I must be in a museum because you are a fine work of art.
  • On a scale of 1 to 10, I would rate you as a 9 and that is just because I am the one you are missing.
  • I am sure you are the answer to my prayers, otherwise, God wouldn’t have sent me here.
  • Did we experience an earthquake or you are the one who rocked my world?
  • It must’ve hurt falling from heaven because I swear you are an angel.
  • I lost my number, I hope you don’t mind lending me yours.
  • All other people call me by my name but you can call me tonight.
  • You must be a parking ticket because you have ‘fine’ written all over you.
  • Here I am, what are your other two wishes?

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dark humour pick up lines
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  • You are so beautiful, I wish I was cross-eyed so as to see you twice.
  • If you are right here with me, who is running heaven?
  • I had to see your appearance to believe that you are this beautiful. Now, can we do the same thing with your inside?
  • Your name must be Google because you have everything I have been searching for.
  • You must have been born in Mars because your body is out of this world.
  • My magic watch says that you are lying naked on my bed right now. I guess it is running a little faster than usual.
  • If you don’t give head to strangers all I have to do is introduce myself.
  • Me and your dress have one thing in common…both of us can look great on you.
  • I think I am a zombie because I want to eat you out.

Cheesy pick-up lines

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Ever wondered why people who don’t seem serious all the time are the ones taken seriously the most? It is because the use of cheesy pick-up lines leaves a permanent impression in a person’s heart. This can be achieved with quotes like:

  • I would hate to have to resolve into spiking your drink. Just say yes to me now.
  • I want to touch you but you have to promise not to call the cops on me.
  • I can’t think straight because all the blood has been drained from my brain to give me a boner.
  • You look familiar as if I just met you recently. I think it is your clothes that are confusing me because I can’t identify you with them on.
  • I want a clone of you for myself. Lend me your groin hair, I hear that works best.
  • I don’t want to come between you, or do I?
  • I find your lack of nud*ity disturbing.
  • Do you want me to wait for you in my car, or will the closet just do?
  • Do you know why life without you is like a broken pencil? Because it is pointless.
  • Your face is definitely magnetic because it pulled me over here.
  • Are you lost? Heaven is a long way from here.
  • What is a nice person like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?
  • You are so hot that you melt the plastic in my underwear.
  • It’s like you are my homework because I am not doing you but I definitely should be.
  • The Billboard charts ought to be ashamed for not naming you the hottest single of all time.
  • I thought of taking you to the movies, but I remembered that they don’t allow you to go with your own snack.
  • I promise to eat you like an Oreo cookie – open you up and lick the cream in the middle.

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dark humour pick up lines
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Source: UGC
  • Allow me to hold your hand because it looks heavy.
  • You must be wondering where you have seen me before. I was in your dreams last night.
  • I just put you on my to-do list and I am hoping you will check my box.
  • I will never kick you out of my bed unless you wanted me to do you on the carpet.
  • Remember my name because you will be screaming it later.
  • Don’t be selfish. The body is yours to keep for the rest of your life so you shouldn’t mind sharing it with me just for a night.
  • It’s like your magic made me a beaver because I am dying for your wood.
  • If I were you, my goal would be to have se*x with me.
  • You must be religious because you are the answer to all my prayers.

Pick up lines for guys

The burden of building a relationship always falls on guys and that is why they are the ones to ask girls out. Good luck getting that first date if you don’t plan to use some unique pick-up lines. If you want to be successful, you must be ready to deploy pick-up lines such as:

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  • Hey, is it just me, or we were meant to be soul mates.
  • If you make heavy metal your favourite music I promise to make you learn how to scream.
  • Wow! I never thought you looked way better than what I have been seeing through my telescope.
  • I thought of you only once today, it’s just that I never stopped.
  • It seems you wished upon a star because today happens to be your lucky day.
  • Your outfit is dazzling but it will look better rumpled in a bunch of mysteries that are yet to be solved.
  • I am calling the cops because it must be illegal to look as good as you.
  • You ought to be a professional boxer because you are a knockout!
  • Don’t mind me, I am just following orders. The voice inside my head commanded me to approach and ask you out.
  • It is okay if you don’t want to have children with me, we will just practice.
  • I know a perfect way to burn off the calories in that drink. If we go to a quiet place, I would tell you all about it.
  • You must be like an elevator because I have been imagining going up and down on you.
  • I have been having trouble sleeping by myself. Can you sleep with me?
  • Apart from taking my breath away, what do you do for a living?
  • You must be a magician because every time I stare at you everyone else disappears.
  • You must be a postal worker because you just inspected my package.

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dark humour pick up lines
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  • I may have lost my virg*inity long ago, but I can give you the box it came in.
  • You just look like my next boyfriend.
  • The only thing standing between me and you should be latex.
  • I think I might call the police because you just stole my heart.
  • There is a party in my pants and I am inviting only you.
  • That is a nice shirt but I hope I can talk you out of it.
  • I am not drunk; I am just intoxicated by you.
  • There must be a mirror in your pants because I can see myself in them.
  • You are so hot that you make the equator feel like the north pole.
  • I am no dentist but I bet I could give you a filling.

Dark pick-up lines for him

You are not the only one who wants to date her so you must stand out if you want to be the one she says yes to. Do whatever needs to be done to impress her but the easiest way is with some dark pick-up lines like:

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  • I am sick and the only way to get better is by talking to you.
  • I am hoping to study your shirt in braille without you taking it off.
  • Allow me to live in your socks so that I will always be with you every step of the way.
  • There is something wrong with my eyes. I need your help because I can’t seem to take them off you.
  • Are you a light switch? Because every time I see you, you turn me on.
  • Go ahead and call the cops but we will see who comes first.
  • You must be yoghurt because all I want is to spoon you.
  • I desire to have a woman I don’t deserve in my life.
  • I am a stranger here. Can you give me the directions to your apartment?
  • Do I have to sign for your package?
  • Your parents must have been bakers because you have some nice buns.
  • Sorry, that seat is taken, but you can sit on my lap if you like and we will talk about whatever pops up.
  • I seem to have lost my treasure. Can I search your chest and see if it is there?
  • I love my bed but I’d rather be in yours.
  • Your body is 70% water and I am so thirsty for it.
  • Your clothes would really look great on my bedroom floor.

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dark humour pick up lines
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Source: UGC
  • If I was a judge, I would sentence you to my bed.
  • Do you have room for an extra tongue in your mouth?
  • I hope you can do CPR because you just took my breath away.
  • Thank you for your gift. I have been wearing this smile ever since you gave it to me.
  • I must be an archaeologist because I need to examine your large bone.
  • As long as I have a face you will always have a place to sit.
  • I am an adventurer and my mission is to explore you.
  • To avoid any doubt, you and I are headed for the same bed tonight, right?
  • Excuse me for being straight to the point. I think it’s time we officially met.
  • As a doctor, I think you are suffering from a lack of Vitamin me!

While all people have a crush, not all people get their crush. The difference is usually brought about by the first impressions created. If your crush sees you as a boring individual with no future, then he or she will never give you a chance. Dark humour pick-up lines can make all the difference because they will warm the heart of your crush and make them fall in love with you instantly.

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Are you interested to know the best comments for girls' pic to their DM? Yen.com.gh shared an article with 150+ compliments that will flatter a girl you like. A pick-up line or chat-up line is a conversation opener with the intent of engaging a person for romance or dating.

The pick-up lines are so prevalent within the dating scene that not having one can be the difference between walking home with your crush or watching someone else swoop her from under your feet.

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