Mothers-in-law give sleepless nights to daughters-in-law simply because there is tension as to which of the two women can make the man in question very happy now.
As is the norm, sons would have known and loved their mothers longer than they would their wives. So their first loyalty is usually to their mothers.
This means that a wife would have to compete whether she likes it or not. And that is where the wife gets to wonder whether she would ever be accepted warmly by her mother-in-law.
Ghana being a very conservative society means that women may never have a happy marriage until their mothers-in-law like them. Luckily, YEN.com.gh knows how to help.
1. Do not try to be first
Most Ghanaian women feel that as far as they are the wife, a man needs not to put any other woman first. They forget that usually, a man swears his loyalty to his mother and maybe sister, before the man got married.
You as a wife do not need to knock his mother off the top. You have to know your own territory and be first there.
2. Let her feel like she can teach you
Sometimes, humility is a strategy. Yes, it may look like you are pretending but you can intentionally ask your mum-in-law for advice on things even you know better than she does.
This trick works with mothers-in-law who love to be taken seriously all the time. Nod while she talks and gestures and make her feel like she is a necessary teacher.
3. Show interest in her life
If you need for your mother-in-law to like you, you must show interest in her life beyond your normal marital relationship to her.
It is not bad asking her how she grew up, how she met your husband's father or even what she fears most in life.
4. Do not try to solve problems you came to meet
When you walk into a family, you obviously get to see that there are issues in there. Do not try to be a hero.
You can help but be prepared to not be the one taking credit. Choose your husband as the one to take credit.
5. Her daughters should be your sisters
The last step here is also realising that your mother-in-law looks at how you treat other members of the family, especially her daughters.
If her daughters like you, she will find it difficult to dislike you. Try as much as possible to be a sister to your husbands sisters and mum-in-law will smile some more.
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