Friends with benefits definition may mean different things to different people. For instance, it may stand for someone you have known for a long time, a little while, or even just met and are having sexual relations with. Whichever the case, it is unlikely that they or you will be taking them out on a fancy date before making out with them. So, how do you make such an association work?
Many people are comfortable with the idea of being friends with benefits. This is because they get to enjoy their privileges without being committed to relationships.
One may be at ease to have sex with someone with whom they share a solid friendship. However, these friendships with benefits arrangements can be challenging as well. So, what does FWB mean?
Friends with benefits meaning
FWB slang is used to stand for someone who wants to engage in sex with someone but wants no commitment. Primarily, this kind of relationship plays out where the individuals are in for the intimate benefits. In most cases, there are no dates or romance involved.
12 insightful friends with benefits rules
Things are likely to fall apart if both parties decide to enter the friends with benefits arrangement without clearly understanding each party’s expectations. Once sex is in the picture, feelings may not be involved.
Some people who have tried this setup found themselves being used and feeling down because the other party did not want any connection with them, apart from having sex. Therefore, communication is quite vital in such a setting. Here are some pointers that could be vital when engaging in an FWB setup.
1. Give meaning to the existing relationship
Taking this first step will save both of you. A friend is someone who knows you at heart and is honest with you. It is advisable to sit down and talk openly about the state of your relationship and what sex could do to it. Would you both be okay if the relationship comes to an end?
Both of you must be clear of where you are and if anyone would be thinking of taking the relationship to the next level. It will be easier to maneuver through the relationship if you agree on such issues.
2. Have it clear on sleepovers and snuggling
There is something special about cuddling and snuggling together; it creates a connection between two people. This is because a bonding hormone known as oxytocin is released and could complicate the relationship. Therefore, it is wise to agree if sleeping and cuddling are part of the deal.
3. Communicate your sex needs to your partner
Let your friend know what you expect from them regarding sexual expectations, what you would like from the FWB relationship, and what to avoid. Remember, you know your body well, so it’s only fair if they know what you love and dislike.
4. Have an understanding of where to keep your stuff
You may have sleepovers which could have you or them leaving some of their belongings at one another’s place. You need to agree that leaving one’s stuff at one's place is allowed and what personal belongings can be left behind. Avoiding overstepping such boundaries is crucial in an FWB setup.
5. Have a clear mindset in case you or your partner meets someone else
In most FWB arrangements, it is often likely for one person to meet someone else whom they would want to settle down with, especially if the relationship was all about sexual benefits.
Have an open communication on whether either party will be affected should the other person walk away and start a romantic relationship with someone different.
6. Create rules on how to behave around each other
Keep in mind that you may be having close or mutual friends in such a setup. With this in mind, you need to agree to share your situation-ship with others. For example, it would be uncomfortable if one of the partners wanted to share with their friends, yet the other party was not ready.
7. Discuss the consequences should the arrangement come to a halt
Circumstances change, and so do FWB agreements. Since this is a short-term agreement, it is vital to agree on what happens after the arrangement ends. Some of the questions you could delve into include, could the two of you remain friends? Will it be possible to hang out around mutual friends and act normally?
8. Avoid at all costs getting jealous
The main motive behind hooking up with a friend is no commitment. However, it is given that both parties may hook up with someone different, and if this happens, how the other party reacts is vital.
If you or your partner start getting jealous of outside hookups, then being friends with benefits is not for you!
9. Keep lines of communication open
Sexual relations can change how the two of you feel, so it is vital to communicate and find out if you are still on the same page in terms of benefits. Find out if the arrangement is still working perfectly for your partner or if anything needs to change.
10. Check-in with yourself
In as much as it’s essential to find out where the other person stands, check in with yourself as well. Is the relationship working for you? If this is the case, then you can go ahead with it. If not, it is advisable to sit down and reflect if something needs to change or come to an end.
11. Have yourself tested for STI’s
It is essential to have yourself tested for any STIs before engaging in any sexual relations. No one wants to spend the entire session with their minds stuck if they could become pregnant or contract a sexually transmitted disease. Discuss the prevention methods you can embrace and what is comfortable for both of you.
12. Go for frequent testing for STIs
It is advisable for people who are sexually active to have themselves tested at least once each year. Thus, discuss how often the two of you will go for testing, even if you are using a condom to protect yourself.
The above read is an eye-opener on what friends with benefits meaning is. Thus, anyone hoping or desiring to engage in a friend with benefits arrangement should not forget the reasons that led to it and try to follow the laid-down rules.
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