100+ guess what jokes and responses that will leave you in stitches

100+ guess what jokes and responses that will leave you in stitches

Laughter is the best medicine. It cures stress-related issues and distracts one from toxic surroundings. Guess what jokes and responses create humour that leaves you in stitches. They are one of the most entertaining segments to flirt with people.

guess what jokes
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Guess what jokes are challenging to get for many people, but they are really fun once you crack them. These jokes are the best to giggle with your family or friends on holiday or get together.

Guess what jokes and responses

Guess what jokes feature short questions and responses that are funny. The jokes can also act as a conversation starter between individuals.

Cute guess what jokes

These kinds of jokes are applicable to people of all ages. Here are some best jokes for people in your circle.

  • There is a place where the English and French live peacefully. Guess what? Canada.
  • The chef gifted his girlfriend something she would like. Guess what? An onion ring.
  • I sneezed during the best time of the day. Guess what? It was at-choo-o'-clock.
  • The teacher caught something. Guess what? He caught my attention.
  • The military was standing right outside my house. Guess what I did? I-ran.
  • My friend got a wooden bike with wooden handles and wheels. Guess what? It woo-den start.
  • I won a rain dance competition, guess what I got? Pneumonia.
  • Finally, mom is coming home after a work trip. Guess what I will get? I will get yelled at.
  • Guess what happens to a frog’s car when it breaks down? It gets toad away.
  • Guess what method of transportation is used by self-driving cars on their day off? A human driver.
  • How would you accurately guess what you are having for dinner? Cook it yourself.
  • Guess who you should never lie to. An x-ray operator. They can see right through you.

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guess what jokes
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  • Guess what volcanoes do when they have feelings? They lava each other.
  • Can you guess why the calendar worker got fired? He took a day off.
  • It is pointless. It has no life, but it still dies. Guess what? A battery.
  • It sits at the corner and still travels worldwide. Guess what? A stamp.
  • The mathematician served something special for dessert. Guess what? A pie.
  • The bear failed the exam. Guess why. Because of his big pause.
  • Guess what Dracula brings with him to movie premieres? His ghoul-friend.
  • I dreamt of an orange ocean tonight. Guess what it was—a Fanta sea.
  • I saw a cut pig in the market. Guess what it was. Pork chopped.
  • Sign language is such a good idea. Guess why. Because it is quite handy.
  • A thief was caught stealing pizza. Guess what he was told? His marinara rights.
  • Guess why everyone loves eating doughnuts. I do-nut know myself.
  • Guess what Santa calls his elves? Subordinate Clauses.
  • Guess what baby tomato's mommy said when he was getting late for school. Come on, ketch-up.
  • A banana went to see the doctor, and guess what happened? He was not peeling well.
  • A toast was having a sleepover. Guess what he wore. His favourite pa-jam-as.
  • The social media influencer wanted to take some meds, and guess what happened? Her posts went viral.
  • It goes up and never comes down. Guess what. Your age.

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Guess what jokes for your girlfriend

Would you want to make your girlfriend laugh? Guess what jokes are a great way to impress her, make her smile, and get her into the mood.

  • What did the magnet say to the fridge? You are attractive.
  • Guess what flower is best at kissing? Tulips.
  • Guess what the barista said to their crush? I like you a latte.
  • Guess why you should never date an apostrophe. They are possessive.
  • What did the pen say to the calculator? You can always count on me!
  • Kissing is a love language. Do you want to start a conversation?
  • Guess what? Your name is WIFI. Why? Because I feel a connection.
  • Guess what we call insects that are dating. Love bugs.
  • Guess what? I must have scraped my knee, falling for you.
  • Guess how the telephone asked its girlfriend out. It gave her a ring.
  • Baby, guess what the most romantic ship is? Courtship.
  • Why do you have fine written all over you? I am a parking ticket.
  • Knock! Knock! Guess what is there? Olive. Olive who? Olive you!
  • Guess what the light bulb said to the switch. You turn me on!
  • Guess what the squirrel said to its lover? I’m nuts for you.
  • Guess why you shouldn’t break up with a goalie. They are a keeper.
  • Guess where hotdogs go on a date. The meatball.
  • Are you a banana? You are very a-peeling.
  • Guess what? It must have hurt when you fell from heaven.
  • Guess why I will arrest you for robbery. You have stolen my heart.

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guess what jokes
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  • If the alphabet were rearranged, guess what letters would be put together? U and I.
  • Two eggs went out for a comedy gig. Guess what one egg said to the other. Let's get cracking.
  • Guess what bands turbines love. The big metal fans.
  • Guess what the cook gifted his girlfriend. An onion ring.
  • Guess what I have right now. Your attention.
  • Guess what? What? I said guess.
  • Guess what volcanoes do when they have feelings? They lava each other for long.
  • Chop met the steak on their first date. Guess what the chop told the steak. It is very nice to meat you.
  • I have waited for it. It's always coming but never coming. Guess what it is? Tomorrow.
  • My girlfriend won a scrabble tournament. Guess what she got? A re-word.
  • Some couples play the sexist card. Others play the racist card. Guess what my girlfriend plays? My credit card.

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Guess what jokes for your crush

You may lack words to start off a conversation with your crush. However, guess what jokes can come to your rescue. Below are great jokes that you can direct to your crush.

  • Guess what? I am an unemployed guy with a certificate in cuddling, a diploma in caring, and a degree in kissing. I have a job for you
  • If I were a virus, guess what I would do. I would infect you with my love.
  • I guess you are a red blood cell. You have taken the oxygen out of my lungs and brought it right to my heart.
  • Guess what I am if I can crash at your place tonight. Microsoft.
  • Guess what you have done to me. You have become like dandruff. I just cannot get you out of my head.
  • Guess what? I want to rearrange the alphabet letters. I will put the U and I together.
  • You’re blowing me away. Guess why. You are Hurricane Katrina.
  • I could watch you for hours. Guess why. You are Netflix.
  • Knock, knock. Guess what? I’ve been thinking about you all day.
  • Guess what perfect crime we can commit together. I’ll steal your heart, and you can steal mine.
  • Guess what? I just scraped my knee falling for you. Do you have a bandage?
  • Guess what the patient with the broken leg said to their doctor. Hey, doc, I have a crutch on you.

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  • Excuse me, what time is it? I want to remember the exact moment I met the person of my dreams.
  • Give me some raisins. Guess what? I also want a date.
  • Guess what? I want to borrow a kiss from you. I promise to give it back.
  • I guess Santa knows what I want for Christmas. My picture with you says it all.
  • Guess what? You may fall from the sky, from a tree, but the best way to fall is to fall in love with me.
  • I love cars. But I guess you are just like my car. You drive me crazy.
  • Guess why the skeleton did not ask his crush out. He didn’t have the guts.
  • Can you guess what I want? I want to borrow a quarter to call my mom and tell her I just met the person of my dreams.
  • Guess what? You are like the sun. My whole world revolves around you.
  • Could you please guess why you should step away from the bar? You are melting all the ice.
  • I was wondering if you had an extra heart. I guess mine has been stolen.
  • Guess what? Get your license suspended! You are driving so many guys crazy.
  • Guess why you are everything I am looking for? You are like Google.
  • Guess what? If I freeze, don’t blame a computer virus. I was stunned by your beauty.
  • Guess what? My dreamland is occupied by you!
  • Can I guess when you were created? On the seventh day, when God was resting.
  • Guess what? I will be jailed for committing a great sin. Falling in love.

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Funny things to say after guess what

Giving the same old response to the same old question can get boring. When asked to "guess what?", give them a perfect unexpected response. Below is a compilation of funny things you can say after guess what.

  • I don’t care - It is used to stop the other person from attacking you.
  • I don’t think I can do this - This is a sarcastic response to pretend that the pressure to guess is too big.
  • What? - This is the simplest and most polite response with a willingness to know what you are being told.
  • I don’t know - This reply shows that you want to tell the truth as you have no idea what it is they want you to guess.
  • Just tell me - Here, you want to have them tell you what has excited them, for there is no need to guess a bunch of times.
  • Do you want to give me money? This is a funny response that shows you have nothing better to guess.
  • What do you mean? This is a pretence that you have no idea what is meant by “guess what.”
  • I know, I heard. I’m so sorry- A great way to give the other person a small scare. You make them think that something horrible happened to them.
  • No- A simple way to let the other person know that you will not be guessing what.
  • Okay followed by a list of random guesses. A funny response that tells the other person how dumb it was to try and have you guessed. List off everything and anything you can think of as a guess to what nonstop until they stop you and tell you what.
  • GASP- After guess what, have an over-the-top gasp to show you are completely shocked about the information they are about to tell you.
  • Guess what? - A direct way to tell them to guess before you guess what.
  • You’re pregnant! - The response puts the other person in a funny and awkward position of proving that they are, in fact, not pregnant.

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jokes and responses
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  • Exactly! - This is an annoying response to put off the one who said guess what.
  • No way! A reply to pretend you got excited for whatever they are about to tell you.
  • You are about to buy me a coffee - The response is unexpected as you are indirectly asking for a favour.
  • Don’t tell me what to do! - This is a joking response to act offended by their simple question.
  • This is a free country. I don’t have to answer your questions - Pretense to refuse the guess-what question and create shock and laughter.
  • Next question, please - This is a simple and funny way to put off the other person to stop asking irrelevant questions.
  • Chicken - This is a response mainly used by younger children. The response is completely out of topic for any guess.

Guess what jokes are a great way to create humour between people. Through jokes, people tend to enjoy one another's company. The jokes can be directed at your girlfriend, boyfriend, crush or anybody else. Additionally, a response to the guess-what determines how far the jokes will go.

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Yen.com.gh shared an article about teacher appreciation quotes. When they are not at home, kids are in school with their teachers. For this reason, they are considered their second parents. Due to their significant role in children’s upbringing, it is necessary to appreciate them constantly.

When a person does good work, they need to be appreciated. This is no different for teachers who work hard to ensure that they produce great learners. It is always good to appreciate them with motivational quotes when they do so.

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Source: YEN.com.gh

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